I was scared at first. It was very wide, and very long, and it angled straight up. I decided I had to try it once. I slowly and carefully eased myself onto it. It felt weird at first. Then I got used to it. I went up and down, and up and down on it. I was really loving it.

*Now I ride on escalators all the time*
__________________________________________________ __________________

I took my fingers and slowly, gently stretched it apart. It was so pure and white. I licked it once, twice.. I found I couldn't stop. I licked it faster and faster, and harder. I began to scrape my teeth against it. There it was, in my mouth! All sweet and creamy. I was done.

*And I threw away the outsides of my Oreo cookies*
__________________________________________________ _________________

WaNnA ReAd MoRe LoGiN HeRe.............

One night a guy dropped his girlfriend at her home.


As they were about to wish each other goodnight at the front door, the guy started feeling a little in the mood.


With an air of confidence, he leaned with his hand against the wall and smiling, he said to her "Honey , would you give me a kiss?"


Horrified, she replied, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"



"Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?" He asked grinning at her.


"No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"


" Oh come on!


There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!".


"No way , it's just too risky!"


"Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?".


"No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!".


"Oh yes you can. Please?"


"No, no. I just can't" "I'm begging you ... "


Out of the blue, the light on the stairs went on, and


The girl's elder sister showed up in her pajamas, hair dishevelled, And in a sleepy voice she said,


"Dad says to go ahead and give him a kiss, or I can do it. Or if need Be, mom says she can come down herself and do it, but for God's sake and all of ours....


TELL HIM TO TAKE HIS HAND OFF THE DOOR BELL ........

A teenage college guy sent a love letter (in Q/A format) to his classmate.

My Dearest Reshma,


Please answer the following questionnaire. For Options

(A) 10 marks,
(b) 5marks and
(c) 3 marks.


**********



1) Whenever you enter the class room, your sight always falls on me because:

(a) of love
(b) you couldn't control seeing me
(c) really ... Am I doing it?


**********

2) Whenever professor cracks joke, you laugh and turn and look at me because:

(a) you always like to see me smiling
(b) you are testing whether I like jokes
(c) you are attracted by my smile


**********

3) When you were singing in the class, I entered and immediately you stopped singing because:

(a) you are so coy to sing before me
(b) my presence influenced you
(c) you feared that whether I'll like your song


**********

4) When you were showing your childhood photo, when I asked for it, you hide it because:

(a) you felt ashamed
(b) you felt uneasy
(c) you don't know


**********

5) During trekking, myself and my friend gave you hand for lifting you and you took only my friend's because:

(a) you enjoyed my disappointment
(b) you won't feel leaving my hand after grabbing
(c) you don't know


**********

6) You were waiting yesterday for bus and didn't get into your bus...

(a) you were waiting for me
(b) you were dreaming about me and didn't notice the bus
(c) that bus was crowded


**********

7) You introduced me to your parents when they came to college because:

(a) I am going to be your groom
(b) you just want to know what your parents think about me
(c) just you felt like introducing me to them


**********

8) I told that I like girls wearing roses. Next day, you came with a rose on your head because:

(a) to fulfill my wish
(b) you like roses
(c) by chance you got a rose


**********

9) On that day, it was my birthday. You too came to temple early at 6:00 A.M because:

(a) you want to pray along with me
(b) you want to meet me before any one could meet on my birthday
(c) you want to wish me at temple because you are spiritual.


**********

If you have scored more than 40, then you are loving me. Don't delay in expressing it.


If you have scored between 30 and 40, love is budding in your heart and it's getting ready to bloom. If you have scored less than 30, you are in confusion whether to love me or not.


Eagerly awaiting your reply..


Love, Aakash


************ *********

Reshma's reply letter was also in Q/A format ........


Aakash ,

Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.


**********

1) If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the class, sees them.

(a) Yes (b) No


**********

2) If a girl laughs and looks anyone, is it love?

(a) Yes (b) No


**********

3) While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she stop singing or not?

(a) Yes (b) No


**********

4) I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo.

You poked your nose inside..... Right ?


(a) Yes (b) No


**********

5) I avoided to hold your hand during trekking. Couldn't you understand yet?

(a) Yes (b) No


**********

6) Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali ) at the bus stand?

(a)Yes (b) No


**********

7) Shouldn't I introduce you to my parents as a friend?

(a) Yes (b) No


**********

8) You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana's flower. Is it true ?

(a) Yes (b) No


**********

9) Oh was that your birthday. That's why I could see you in temple. I come daily to Temple. Do you know ?

(a) Yes (b) No


If you have answered "Yes" to any of the question, then I am not loving you. If you have answered "No", then you don't know the meaning of Love.


Hope everything is clear to you .

Chandrababuism:

You have two cows in Vijayawada. You hook them to internet and milk them from Hyderabad.

Jayalalithaism:

You have two cows. You teach them to cry,"Ammaaaaaaa..." and fall at your feet.

Karunanidhiism:

You have two cows. You give one to your son and the other to your nephew.

Gandhism:

You have two cows. But you drink goat's milk.

Indiraism:

You have two bulls. You adamantly consider them as cows.

Lalooism:

You have two cows. You buy Rs. 900 Crore worth of cattlefeed for them.

Rajnikantism:

You have two cows. You throw them into air and catch their milk in your mouth.

Rajivism:

You have two cows. You paint them both to get colourful milk.

SoftwarismUltimate....):

Client has 2 cows and u need to milk them

1 . First prepare a document when to milk them (Project kick off)

2 . Prepare a document how long you have to milk them (Project plan)

3 . Then prepare how to milk them (Design)

4 . Then prepare what other accessories are needed to milk them (Framework)

5 . Then prepare a 2 dummy cows (sort of toy cows) and show to client the way in which u will milk them (UI Mockups & POC)

6 . If client is not satisfied then redo from step 2

7 . You actually start milking them and find that there are few problem with accessories. (Change framework)

8 . Redo step 4

9 . At last milk them and send it to onsite. (Coding over)

10. Make sure that cow milks properly ( Testing)

11. Onsite reports that it is not milking there.

12. You break your head and find that onsite is trying to milk from bulls

13. At last onsite milk them and send to client (Testing)

14. Client says the quality of milk is not good. (User Acceptance Test)

15. Offsite then slogs and improves the quality of milk

16. Now the client says that the quality is good but its milking at slow rate (performance issue)

17. Again you slog and send it with good performance.

18. Client is happy???

By this time both the COWs aged and cant milk. (The software got old and get ready for next release repeat from step 1) !!!!!